Nyt pas? Nyt pas?

Tidslinjebilleder
ACTUAL PASSPORT LETTER:
This, apparently, is an actual letter
received by the UK Passport Office.
Dear Sirs,
I'm in the process of renewing my
passport, and still cannot believe how is it
that Sky Television has my address and
telephone number and knows that I
bought a bleeding satellite dish from
them back in 1988, and yet, the
Government is still asking me where I was
bloody born and on what date.
Do you guys do this by hand?
My birth date you have on my pension
book.
It's on all the income tax forms I've filed
for the past 30 years.
It is on my National Health card.
My driving licence.
My car insurance.
On the last eight damn passports I've
had.
It's on all those stupid customs
declaration forms I've had to fill out
before being allowed off the plane over
the last 30 years.
All those insufferable census forms.
Would somebody please take note, once
and for all, that my mother's name is
Mary Anne, my father's name is Robert
and I'd be absolutely astounded if that
WOULD ever change between now and
when I die!!
I apologise, I'm really pissed off this
morning.
Between you an' me, I've had enough of
this bullshit!
You send the application to my house,
then you ask me for my bleeding
address!!
What is going on? Do you have a gang of
neanderthal arseholes workin' there?
Look at my damn picture.
Do I look like Bin Laden?
I don't want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for
shit sakes. I just want to go and park my
arse on some sandy beach somewhere.
And would someone please tell me, why
would you give a shit whether I plan on
visiting a farm in the next 15 days?
If I ever got the urge to do something
wierd to a chicken or a goat, believe you
me, you'd be the last fucking people I'd
want to tell!
Well, I have to go now,'cause I have to go
to the other end of the poxy city to get
another fucking copy of my birth
certificate, to the tune of £30.
Would it be so complicated to have all the
services in the same spot to assist in the
issuance of a new passport the same day?
Nooooooooooooo, that'd be too damn
easy and maybe make sense.
You'd rather have us running all over the
fuckin' place like chickens with our heads
cut off, then WE have to find some
arsehole to confirm that it's really me on
the damn picture - you know, the one
where we're not allowed to smile?!
(bureaucratic fuckin' morons)
Hey, do you know why we couldn't smile
if we wanted to? Because we're totally
pissed off!
Signed
An Irate Citizen
P.S. Remember what I said above about
the picture and getting someone to
confirm that it's me?
Well, my family has been in this country
since 1776 ...
I have served in the military for
something over 30 years and have had
full security clearances over 25 of those
years enabling me to undertake highly
secretive missions all over the world.
However, I have to get someone
'important' to verify who I am - you know,
someone like my doctor ..
WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN
FRIGGIN` PAKISTAN!


Nogen der kan relatere?